things i wish i’d known when i was younger
last week i retired from the company in which i had worked for many years, so finally i have the time to reflect on the mistakes i have made in my life. people tend to think that mistakes are “put” there to make us learn, to make our life richer or more interesting, but i am not willing to accept it. i just wish i had known more when i was younger and could have avoided the mistakes, especially those truly count for a happy life.
i once tried to please all the people around me but ended in failure. no matter what efforts i made, most of them would dislike, belittle or ignore me most of the time. now i see. one can never really know what others do want, so a good deal of whatever you do will certainly be wasted. besides, not everyone is worth the pains you take. some people are simply stupid. you can rarely, if ever, please or change a stupid person. the best thing you can do is to stay away from them. being a stupid person is an infectious disease. the more time you spend around one, the more likely you are to catch it and become one too. on the other hand, those who love you will probably always love you. they are the ones whose opinions are worth caring about.
i would feel sad or angry when those who i had trusted turned out to be gossips or even liars. as we know, the quickest and simplest way to ruin any relationship is to listen to gossip and trust liars. but due to my faith in them, i spent my time believing them and even spreading more, ruining more friendship. now i understand time spent getting angry over them is time wasted, because these gossips and liars are not friends at all. what’s more, people are not likely to change or to be changed. liars usually tell lies. cheaters cheat whenever it suits them, while a loyal friend will stay loyal under all conditions.
i used to follow the latest fashion both in work and in life as i was too eager to be and remain successful. i failed to realize that one can only be a cheap imitation of the ideal of the moment, and lose the choice of being a unique individual meanwhile. however, now i know every winner is destined to be a loser finally. it’s great to be up on the winner’s platform, but just don’t imagine you can stay there for ever. i also get it that however hard you try, you can’t avoid being yourself. you can act and pretend, but the person acting and pretending is still you. if you won’t accept yourself, how could you expect others to accept you? furthermore, when people complain that you’re too fond of going your own way, you must be on the right way, for everybody in power just wants you to follow their orders. they don’t want you to have the freedom to be yourself and cause them troubles.